Monday, March 17, 2008

The First Impression Rose

Last night as I watched episode one of this season's The Bachelor, Tristen posed an interesting question. "What would you do to get the first impression rose?" For those of you that watched the ridiculousness that went down on the show last night, know that this is a difficult question. I guess to answer the question fully, I might have to cross off all the things I wouldn't do to get the first impression rose.

I would never. . .

. . . get out of the limo and dangle the hideously large ring on my ring finger while saying to the bachelor "See this ring here, this is just a place holder 'til you give me the real thing." (Yes, this was acutally said last night.)

. . . bring my clarinet with me and whip it out during a one on one sesh and suck on the reed while telling him "I have to suck on this to make it nice and wet so it will vibrate as I play." (Gross! I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.)

. . . get down on my knees and arm wrestle a 6'5" Enlgish man in hopes of winning over his admiration and affection. (Who are these women?)

And finallay, I would never. . .

. . . no, not ever . . . get so plastered that I'd stuff my lacy white undrewear in his pants pocket with the thought that maybe, just maybe, he would be turned on enough to see past my psychotic brain malfunction and give me a rose. (What the???)

What would you do to get the first impression rose?

8 comments:

Jennifer Rolph said...

Aubs I really enjoy reading your post, I always get a good laugh!

April said...

Yes! I love that you love the bachelor. Such good TV.

Jessica Reeves said...

How funny!! I missed the show last night. Actually, I've never seen The Bachelor but it sounds pretty entertaining!!

Heather said...

Weird...I would and have done all of these things trying to land a man...ha ha yeah right!

This show is so sad...it reminds me of a Singles Ward! :)

Erica said...

ha! i remember the belmont bachelor days!

Madsen Family said...

Your blog is pure comedy. You need your own TV show next :) Yes, there were some pretty trashy women Monday night! He's a doll though,his dancing during the closing credits had me and Kev laughing so hard!

Bracken and Bracken said...

I am seriously worried about where this season is headed. I really wish that these women would just be normal. You can tell when they've been working really hard on their opening line when all that needs to be said is Hi, How are you? I'm ___, what's you name? These women are so overdramatic but I guess that's why they are on TV!!

Tristen Ure said...

I'd trip him and then tell all the other girls they best go home cause he just FELL in love with UREGIRL!!!