Many of you already know this about me, but I'm a total Wheel of Fortune nerd! I've been watching this show since I was 2. I really wanna go on and win a load of cash, so I practice as often as I can. Tonight as I was playing along with Pat and Vanna, I was so excited because I thought I had totally solved the puzzle before everyone else. The category was "What are you doing?" Here's what was up on the board when I thought I solved it:
_ _ _ _ _ N _ _
_ _ _ T _ _ _ S T _ _ _
I was so sure I thought I knew it that I started jumping up and down on the couch screaming:
LICKING A POSTAGE STAMP
I kept screaming "Licking a postage stamp, licking a postage stamp, licking a postage stamp," so that one of the contestants would hopefully hear me, solve the puzzle and win a couple thousand bucks. (My family hates it when I do this.) Of course the contestant doesn't hear me and he calls another letter: "R"
Immediately I speak my mind. "No, you dumby! There's no R."
I am then rebuked when Pat says,"Yes, there are 2 R's."
"What! No there's not!" My brother is laughing at me in the background. I am dumbfounded. What the crap does the puzzle say???
R _ _ _ _ N _ _
_ _ _ T _ _ _ _ S T _ R _
And before I can even take another look at the puzzle, the contestant calls out:
READING A BEDTIME STORY
Are you kidding me? Now, some may say, Aubrey, you were WAY off in left field my friend. But wait! Take a quick look. Before he called that "R", the puzzle honestly could have read "LICKING A POSTAGE STAMP." See!
Oh well. It was a valiant try. But I think this story perfectly illustrates why I will probably never go on this show...I would make a complete idiot of myself by shouting out the wrong answer, thereby embarrassing myself on national television. I guess I'll just keep practicing.