Wednesday, February 10, 2010

{ THE BACHELOR: Hometown Dates }

I'm sorry to keep you all on the edge of your seats, waiting for my Tuesday re-cap of The Bachelor. Life got busy so thanks for being patient. Now without any further adieu, here ya go friends...

I have to admit, I only 1/2 watched the show this week. I was caught somewhere between correcting 10 pages of Math homework (how am I supposed to know how many quarts are in a gallon!) and giving a 4 year old a bath while trying to keep the water IN the tub. Isn't babysitting the BEST! So, as far as commentary goes, this is all you're gonna get this week. Sorry. Take it or leave it:

GIA (New York, NY): I pretty much missed Jake and Gia's boat ride through New York City. Although, while pouring a glass of chocolate milk, I caught a glimpse of Gia snapping a "kissing" picture. Gross. Why do kissing pictures make me so uncomfortable? As for Gia's parents, I see where she gets her stunningly good looks...NOT!!!!!!

ALI (Williamstown, MA): I really don't remember much of this hometown date. I think I was reading the kids a story and tucking them into bed. I hear I didn't miss much though. Something about a tribute to a dead grandma? Yah, weird. So glad I jumped on the Tenley train while there was still time.

TENLEY (Newberg, OR): I can't get the awkward visual of Tenley's "lyrical dance" out of my head. I love Tenley, don't get me wrong. She's still my favorite, by a longshot, but it just made me uncomfortable (more so than Gia's kissing pictures) and weirded me out...a little. Anyway, her family was super sweet, she's super sweet, and it would be super sweet if Jake picked her to spend the rest of his boring life with.

VIENNA (Geneva, FL): Vienna sausage has got to go! I seriously have a hard time looking at the girl. The googley eyes, the orange spray tan, the bad hair extensions. They've got to go. All of them! And did anyone else squirm a litle when Vienna's dad walked in on them kissing on the bed? Awkward. Gross. Stop. It. Now.

As for the Rose Ceremony, or lack thereof, shoot me now! Why must everyone on this show act so dramatic? Enough is enough! As if Ali's dramatic-falling-on-the-floor-in-the-hotel-hallway wasn't enough to put you over the edge, then surely her hair had you rolling on the floor with laughter. Oh, that HAIR! And rumor on the street has it that she left Jake for her job at Facebook? Good choice Ali.

And Jake, don't think you're getting off the hook so easy. Why must you keel over and cry on the stairail and sob like you do! Grow some huevos and take it like a man! Then, get back in there and join the other 3 ladies and get ready for next week's "bang cards." Hahaha! That's what my roommate calls the "Fantasy Suite Card." Hahaha! Can't wait!


Kim said...

Hahaha! Thanks so much! I've been waiting all day!
I have to say I was DYING during Tenley's romantic dance routine for Jake! I wanted her to stop and just feel the awkwardness in the air! Even if I knew how to dance - I wouldn't dance for someone I was dating (on TV! in front of the world!!!) Sorry Tenley I think that might have cost you your place in Jake's heart - maybe...
And Ali - please just go to work and don't come back like Ed did! It's over now!
Love your comments Aubrey - Love you too!

Marcy said...

Okay, I really just want to watch an episode of The Bachelor with you and your Mom. You guys are a hoot! I read realitysteve in a weak, weak moment and think I know what happens. Darn it! Ah well, it's still mighty good entertainment :)

Bracken and Bracken said...

Since your commentary is lacking here's my two sense:

Gia-I think she is gonna win!!

Tenley, your dance was ridiculous but your family was actually normal and super cute, someone give them a Book of Mormon!!

Ali, did you not watch the Bachelorette last season, hello, that drama was so last year!!!

As for Vienna, I think Joel McHale said it best on the Soup when he said "That girl isn't cross-eyed, she's just always looking around for other options"!!

theblibbys said...

OH HOW I WAITED ALL DAY FOR THIS! You didn't miss too much with this show. I am starting to get majorly annoyed with this season. It is not one of my favs, but of course, I still watch it! I laughed at the "bang cards" true! That's probably why he picks Vienna cause she is a freak-a-leak in the bedroom and he likes it...hah Justin is down in California today...totally missing him!

The Townsend Family said...

Hahahahaa Aubrey, I do admit that I wait all week for your commentary. Even when you don't pay attention it's still awesome. Pure talent. Tenley will for sure win.

PS - I completely invited myself to your meeting with my future sis inlaw Tiffany. Rude? Yes. Ask me if I care!!!!! WOO HOOO!!!!! xoxo